In a recent discussion, Shamea Morton opened up about her rocky friendship with Porsha Williams from “Real Housewives of Atlanta,” highlighting how communication is crucial in relationships. Morton felt unappreciated and expressed her frustrations to co-star Angela Oakley instead of directly addressing Williams, leading to misunderstandings. During an episode, both women confronted their feelings, revealing underlying issues like jealousy and missed connections. The narrative emphasizes the importance of direct communication to resolve conflicts, suggesting that unresolved feelings can harm friendships. Both Morton and Williams must address their grievances to improve their bond, rather than discussing issues with others.
Silence will not serve your needs.
This simply means that if you want something in any of your relationships—whether professional, romantic, or platonic—you need to voice your needs. However, it’s equally important to speak to the right person.
Before even diving into the latest season of Real Housewives of Atlanta, Shamea Morton, a familiar yet fresh member of the cast, openly shared that her long-standing friendship with RHOA star Porsha Williams was experiencing some challenges. In a March interview with Angela Yee, just before the season premiere, Morton addressed opinions suggesting that the friendship seemed one-sided, noting that their enthusiasm and efforts toward each other appeared unequal.
“I strive to be the best friend I can, hoping it’s returned. When it’s not, there’s only so much I can do,” she stated. “I will continue to show up as the loyal friend I am… sometimes, that’s my flaw.”
In that moment, it was easy to empathize with Morton and speculate that her newfound full-time role and her marriage to a wealthy man might have caused some tension. Meanwhile, Williams’s personal life has been tumultuous, marked by a contentious divorce from Simon Guobadia (who was previously linked to former co-star Falynn Pina). As the season progressed, however, it became clear that Morton could have taken proactive steps to address her feelings instead of letting them fester.
This past Sunday’s episode showcased Morton confiding in her co-star, Angela Oakley, about her concerns regarding her best friend. This off-camera discussion included issues like Williams’s absence from Morton’s wedding in Kenya, rumors that Williams didn’t want her to be successful on RHOA, and the feeling that she was acting like a subordinate friend. Sharing this insight with Williams left her emotional. While Oakley’s choice to relay Morton’s feelings might have been seen as retaliatory—considering Williams had previously joked about her own indiscretions—it was concerning that Morton felt more at ease discussing her issues with co-stars than with her lifelong friend.
During a confrontation at the Pampered by Porsha event, where Williams seemed upset with Morton, she managed to shift the narrative, making Williams seem at fault for harboring Oakley’s insights without discussing them with her. “I love Porsha and view her as a sister. I can’t believe she’d allow such a conversation without mentioning it to me. That hurts,” she expressed in a confessional. Morton acknowledged her fear of confronting Williams but insisted that Williams should have approached her first.
When asked about her unshared feelings, Morton simply stated, “I’ve always opted to be gracious.” Williams replied somewhat dismissively: “Thank you for your grace.”
While that may seem a rude response (as one should respect the concept of grace), I can understand why she reacted that way. How does one demonstrate grace if they vent to others instead of addressing the source? That approach only complicates matters.
This reflects a significant issue many women face in friendships. If you plan to move past an incident, truly move on. Don’t keep score. But if feelings remain unresolved, addressing them with the individual involved is crucial. Even if their response isn’t what you hoped for, bringing your feelings to the forefront is vital for fostering a healthier relationship. Ultimately, it’s not fair to expect others to read our minds and rectify their behavior. We all make mistakes and unintentionally hurt others; if issues aren’t lovingly addressed, frustration and resentment will only build. Remember, silence won’t get you what you desire.
I once experienced the painful end of a meaningful friendship because a friend sent me a lengthy email detailing their grievances instead of discussing them over the phone or in person. (As Oakley pointed out, the fear of confrontation is real.) She referenced specific conversations, some of which I couldn’t recall, and seemed to have no clear aim in mind. When I acknowledged her feelings but disagreed with her recollection, she criticized my response for not aligning with her expectations. I was taken aback and hurt. Watching Morton upset about Williams’s feelings regarding Oakley’s revelations felt somewhat absurd and slightly manipulative to me.
That being said, neither party can be deemed entirely innocent. Jealousy has likely played a role in their dynamic. Morton may have yearned for her moment in the spotlight and felt resentment about only being a supporting friend. Similarly, Williams might have envied Morton’s lifestyle and family life, evident in her well-kept appearance. The emergence of any tension might stem from Morton ascending to a prominent position. Long-term friendships, while valuable, don’t guarantee healthiness or favoritism. They might resemble long hair: despite having it for years, split ends can inhibit growth and weaken the bond.
In the past, both women have watched others malign their friendship, from Kandi Burruss to Phaedra Parks. They’ve colored various situations before discussing them with each other. Communication lapses and failures to support one another exist on both sides. Every friendship requires effort from both parties. Although Morton often appears as the distressed party in this public friendship, both carry significant emotional baggage. Life changes, celebrity pressures, motherhood, and relationship challenges can strain friendships. Missteps are inevitable; consistent communication between friends is essential rather than confiding in outsiders. The show likely exacerbates these issues, pulling unresolved frustrations into the open.
Both women have unresolved matters that they need to address, and the reluctance to label their relationship as broken indicates there’s still hope for mending it. To quote Janet Jackson from Why Did I Get Married Too?, “FIX IT!” However, if fixing it requires either of them to exit the series, well, good luck with that…